There is no harmony at the Mikado auditions but Phil thinks of a treat for Ruth.

Radio Times: A wandering minstrel auditions.

Characters: Brenda, David, Hayley, Lynda, Phil, Robert

• Hayley has her mind on the auditions and hopes to persuade Roy that it is something they could do together. Brenda needs little persuasion to go too; it could make a good radio feature.
• Lynda insists that Robert comes to give her moral support, Phil can be so stubborn (Robert thinks he is firm); he insists that the cast should be able to sing. Larry Lovell is going to audition but Lynda is not having him in her production: he has no esprit de corps.
• Brookfield has a nice little heffer and is expecting another soon. Phil confides in David that tonight’s auditions will need a miracle because Lynda puts acting ability as her priority whereas he – well, we know what he looks for. David is concerned that Ruth is a bit down after shouting at Pip, so he is glad that Jill will spend the evening with her. If only he could do something to lift her spirits.
• Hayley impressed her fellow would-be thespians, as did Christine Barford but they thought Julia was awful. Lynda and Phil disagree on just about everything: Hayley has a nice mezzo-soprano voice but Yum-Yum must be a soprano, what role should Simon play, or Jack or Larry, whether Julia’s voice (or lack of) rules her out etc, etc, etc. Enough! Phil must go. There will be no decisions made tonight.
• Back at the farm Phil recounts the proceedings to David, who has twin calves to show for his evening, but Phil’s thoughts have not been entirely on G & S. He suggests that David could cook a meal for Ruth at home; she would like that, but only if Phil can find him something foolproof.