Helen discovers Rob’s plot but he comes up smelling of roses as usual.

Radio Times: Lynda has a proposition for Bert, and Henry reveals a secret.

Characters: Bert, Helen, Henry, Lynda, Pat, Rob, Ursula

• It couldn’t be put more clearly: Helen’s decision to have a home birth is against medical advice; in the light of her history there is a high risk, so her consultant sends her away with a plea to think it through. It seems that Helen has had the temerity to go to the hospital alone – on the bus. On the bus! Rob is astounded that someone in her condition should travel on a bus. He accuses her of forgetting his mum’s party but she stands her ground: she was going to take a taxi back.
• As they entertain Ursula to tea, Henry is being really wilful; he tells his mum that he hates her because she wants to send him away. What? Left alone with Pat, Ursula pleads ignorance of the cause of this outburst. When Helen returns she is incandescent; she grabs Ursula’s car keys and drives off: if Rob sends Henry away she will kill him. The mothers give chase in Pat’s car with Ursula now admitting that she and Rob had discussed the possibility of private school for Henry. Helen’s reaction was outrageous.
• Lynda calls on Bert with a housewarming gift and finds the place unusually untidy. It’s ‘lived in’ retorts Bert; the Fairbrothers are currently staying with him. Might he consider not opening his garden on the same day as hers? No, he wouldn’t. He has no message to the world; he is simply doing it for his Freda.
• As usual, the loathsome one has all the answers: they were just exploring the possibility of private school; Henry is only five and he must have got confused about living at the school; they were looking at ways to make life easier for Helen; he is worried sick about how she will cope. She ends up feeling it’s all her fault; her erratic behaviour is putting their baby at risk; it won’t happen again – no, he won’t let it. When Rob goes to fetch Henry, he forbids her to come; she is to take time to think about the damage she has caused.